Blazing Saddles sure have some good ones.. these is are some of my favorites in that movie.. Cracks me up everytime
1.Taggart: HORSES!!? We can't afford to lose no horses u dummy. Send over a couple o' niggers.
2.Hedley Lamarr: My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Taggart: God darnit Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore.
3.Bart: A man drink like that and he don't eat, he is going to DIE.
Jim: When?
(the look on jims face is priceless)
[describing how everyone wanted to duel him when he was The Waco Kid]
4.Jim: Then one day I hear "Reach for it, mister." I spun around, and there I was standing face to face with a six year old kid... Well, I just laid down my guns and walked away...... Little bastard shot me in the ass! So I limped to the nearest saloon, crawled inside a whiskey bottle, and I've been there ever since.
Last edited by Maugetar on 14 Feb 2006, 01:11, edited 1 time in total.
Character is what you do in the dark. In gloom i work.
and from my favorite sit-com of all time.. Friends
[Chandler has bet that he doesnt need to joke everytime someone says something stupid, in the end he cant controll him self anymore]
1.Chandler: I can't take it any more! So you win, okay? Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross, phone call for you today - Tom Jones, he wants his pants back! And Hornswoggle? What? Are you dating a character from "Fraggle Rock"? Ahh
2.Ross: According to Chandler, what phenomenon scares the bejesus out of him?
Monica: Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance!
Ross: That is correct.
Joey: The Irish jig guy?
Chandler: His legs flay about as if independent from his body!
3.[Re: "If you had to give up sex or food, which would you pick?"]
Monica: Sex!
Chandler: Seriously. Answer faster.
Monica: I'm sorry, sweetie. When she said "sex" I wasn't thinking of sex with you.
Chandler: It's like a big hug.
Phoebe: Ross, how about you? Sex or food?
Ross: Sex!
Phoebe: What about sex or dinosaurs?
Ross: My God, it's like Sophie's Choice.
Phoebe: Joey, if you had to give up sex or food, which would you pick?
Joey: I don't know it's too hard.
Rachel: Come on, you have to answer.
Joey: Okay... sex. No, food. No, uh... I want both! I want girls on bread!
4.Chandler: From now on, I have no first name.
Joey: So - you're just Bing???
Chandler: I have no name..
haha, laughed my ass of doing this.. hahah
Character is what you do in the dark. In gloom i work.
I know what you're thinking... Did I fire six shots or only five? To tell you the truth, I forgot it myself in all this excitement.
This here's a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and it can blow your head clean off. Now, you must ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky?
Well, do you, punk?
I ain't leaving without your soul and I am sober this time.
Choose World of Warcraft. Choose a race. Choose a class. Choose horde or alliance. Choose a fucking big weapon, choose spells, curses, potions and bandages. Choose good health, low repair costs, and phat epix. Choose fixed montly repayments. Choose a starting area. Choose your guild. Choose bags and shard pouches. Choose a Tuxedo Shirt on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose ISP and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that chair watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself.
Gupim wrote:Choose World of Warcraft. Choose a race. Choose a class. Choose horde or alliance. Choose a fucking big weapon, choose spells, curses, potions and bandages. Choose good health, low repair costs, and phat epix. Choose fixed montly repayments. Choose a starting area. Choose your guild. Choose bags and shard pouches. Choose a Tuxedo Shirt on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose ISP and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that chair watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself.
I really do have to add some seinfeld quotes i find good here:
Jerry: You realize of course you're naked?
Naked Man: Naked, dressed, I don't see any difference.
Jerry: You oughtta sit here. There's a difference.
Naked Man: You got something against a naked body?
Jerry: I got something against yours.
Naked Man: I'm not ashamed of my body.
Jerry: Exactly. That's your problem. You should be
Jerry: This isn't a good time.
Telemarketer: When would be a good time to call back, sir?
Jerry: I have an idea, why don't you give me your home number and I'll call you back later?
Telemarketer: Umm, we're not allowed to do that.
Jerry: Oh, I guess because you don't want strangers calling you at home.
Telemarketer: Umm, no.
Jerry: Well, now you know how I feel.
[hangs up phone]
Jerry: Kramer, I can't do that. It's illegal.
Cosmo Kramer: It's not illegal.
Jerry: It's against the law.
Cosmo Kramer: Well, yeah...
if we close our eyes and say it's a dream... it will STAB US TO DEATH!
Spike: He will die in about 5 minutes... But hes got something you dont have
Buffy: What's that ?
Spike: 5 minutes.
Another series:
Zap: (looking at hot babe) Ooo i'd like to do the Neptunian-Fandango with her!, if you know what i mean...
Zap: Kif, What do i mean?
Bender: Oh, no room for Bender, huh? Fine, I'll go build my own lunar Lander! With blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the lunar Lander and the blackjack!
Zapp Brannigan: Good work everyone; the mother-ship is destroyed. (Mother-ship emerges from space) What the hell is that thing?
Kif: It appears to be the mother-ship...
Zapp Brannigan: Then what did we just blow up?
Kif: (checks radar) The Hubble Telescope.
Mains through the ages: Asharak -> Liandrin -> Shaidar -> Albeo
Sneek: So much, so fast. It's hard not to OD
